Fraud, Derbies, Flares, Moving Goalposts…

By: Luka | September 24th, 2009

It’s all happening in Swedish football.

First we have the curious case of IFK Gothenburg keeper Kim Christensen shamelessly and blatantly reducing the size of his goals by nudging each goalpost inwards by a few inches. I’m not going to pretend I found this myself, so let 101greatgoals describe it to you (though here is the video evidence embedded):

It would have been interesting to see if the keeper remembered to reinstate the goals to their normal length for the second half as the teams switched ends.

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The confused Assyrians from Sodertalje (Syrianska FC) were one of a number of clubs (in both the Superettan and Allsvenskan) to fall prey to a 21 year-old fraudster from Norrköping. He apparently bought small sponsorship packages in the clubs, entitling him to receive tickets to games, which he then sold on. ~~I hope they throw the book at him.~~ Take that you pseudo-ethnics.
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I might write up an extended dossier about the up-coming Sodertalje Derby. But then again, I might not. In the meantime, here’s some cliche’ talk from the uber-hated enemy about the game:

Suleyman Sleyman, hometown hero for the “other” team in Sodertalje, Syrianska FC, describes the match as “Bigger than a Stockholm Derby.” He elaborates, “The Stockholm Derby draws more people, but these derbies in Södertälje have a much greater significance.” That’s some statement, but one I would tend to agree with (just don’t ask me what I know about the Stockholm derby). Too bad Suleyman will be watching the game from the stands as he picked up a season ending injury over a month ago. LOL @ him.

Syrianska’s saviour, Robert Massi (pictured, both outstanding in terms of goalscoring and facial grooming), who has decided two previous derbies (you see, Assyriska doesn’t have a great record in the Derby dammit), essentially states “the derby is everything”. Although I will never agree with anything that emanates from the mind of any person who purports to support Syrianska, I must say there is some truth in these words (i.e. they aren’t just cliches): “Anything can happen in a derby. But we have a greater desire and a better team. Having players who can decide a match on their own. ” Emphasis on the parts in bold. It’s true that not only relative to our enemy, but in absolute terms, our players have shown little desire when it counts – in the big games and in the derby. However, with a new manager comes a new mentality, outlook and confidence and the inevitable winning run (how often does that happen?) usually follows. Hopefully all of these factors will combine to send our confused little brothers back down to earth this weekend.
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Crisis club Hammarby is in, erm, crisis, languishing in the relegation zone and looking ever more likely to join the party down in the Superettan. In their latest loss (6th in a row), at home to GAIS, the match had to be halted in the 74th minute after their infuriated supporters went all crazy like with flares and fireworks while some attempted to invade the sitting area of the chairman and board memebers (see picture). The chairman says he felt threatened, and then gave the supporters the guilt trip by murmuring: “They are destroying our ability to obtain sponsors for next year. We have major financial worries.” I can already see him receiving apologetic letters from the supporters of the non-letterbomb type.
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Finaaaaaly, new Assyriska coach Conny Karlsson had his first work out with Assyriska today (or yesterday, or whenever). Judging by the photo, he should be implementing double sessions, bless him.